The plan was hatched many years ago on an isolated Island off the Coast of Croatia. Only accessible by boat and known to only a few people.
secret agent 000 who has a special licence to
blow anything out of all proportion. All of the worlds chess enforcement forces are now looking for the pair including Chessbase and Chessvibes. Even the Closetgrandmaster has mobilized his considerable resources to try apprehend her.
Whatever you do don't play the Slav against her. Below you can see what happened to the last agent sent to eliminate her.
There a trio of chess grandmasters were training a young girl for a very special mission.
The mission was to sneak into New Zealand and steal the country's GDP,a massive NZ$55. She had a partner who posed as her father
and they had to infiltrate Hamilton Chess club where the central depository was held by a fanatical clan of U1700's. They fought to the last but were no match for these supervillains.
Here is a photo of the young changeling. She goes by many names and is a master of disguise. If you spot her do not approach but immediately inform Steve Giddons,
blow anything out of all proportion. All of the worlds chess enforcement forces are now looking for the pair including Chessbase and Chessvibes. Even the Closetgrandmaster has mobilized his considerable resources to try apprehend her.
Whatever you do don't play the Slav against her. Below you can see what happened to the last agent sent to eliminate her.
So this monster and her accomplice are probably spending their ill gotten fortune in the lap of luxury leaving behind them a shattered nation and a legion of U1700's who have been so demoralized they may now never become grandmasters. A sad story.
Fun ! What a scary little blondie.....ooolala,poorest U1700s......
ReplyDeleteExcellent Report Special Agent Alex Wohl 008
ReplyDeleteFor your eyes only
take note agent Wohl the Hamilton Chess Club's plans to take over the world have not stopped. This weekend the are staging Rapid Tournament and offering free entry and international publicity for Women Grandmasters
Ah yes, all the above is true. But wait, there is more.. no your pay grade does not let you view ultra-secrets. I will report on the Hamilton Rapid anon.
ReplyDeleteAgent 008? As in "ate everything in sight"? I'll pay that one :)
ReplyDeleteI have heard from a source deep inside Hamilton chess club that the agents failed to make off with their treasured sense of Humour. They are holding an open Rapid tournament (http://hamiltonchess.net/events/hamilton-rapid/) this weekend, hoping to trap these foreign agent or any others lurching about. I wish them luck, they will need it. 008 signing off.
ReplyDeleteExcellent work, Alex!
ReplyDeleteFunny stuff :)
ReplyDeleteLookalike: So Giddons (sic) blows everything out of proportion? Could this be the same Alex Wohl, who spent every evening of the Hastings tournament, crying into his beer, about how appalling it is that so many East European GMs fail to stand close enough to the shower in the morning, and should be banned from tournaments because they don't smell sweet enough? Are the two Alex Wohl's by chance related? I think we should be told.
ReplyDeleteThank you Steve for reminding me of a subject I have been meaning to rant about for ages! Were you trying to make a point?
ReplyDeleteI think the point I was trying to make is fairly obvious, but if it's not, I don't feel inclined to waste any further time repeating it. Like any good chessplayer, I know a lost position when I see one and I resign. I have taken down my blog and will not be engaging in any further punditry on matters in the chess world. If even a voice of intelligence and reason like yourself cannot see the seriousness of what happened in NZ, then there is no hope for chess. Have a good life, all of you, but it's not a life I want any part of.
ReplyDeleteAs I see it the whole point of punditry is to exchange opinions and have some fun. I find it less fun if at least some people don't disagree with one. Many people agree with you Steve so I don't see why you consider your position lost. Unclear would be my assessment. Please reconsider leaving us :)
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ReplyDelete